Elbow Tree

  • Home
  • Our Team
  • Our Story
    • Our Story
    • Our Endorsements
    • Our Locations
    • Our Offices
    • Third Spaces
    • Our Collection
  • Our Approach
    • Christian Counseling
    • EMDR
    • Our Offerings
    • FAQ
  • Our Voice
  • Nuts & Bolts
    • Our Pricing
    • Our Communication Security
    • Contact Us
    • Counselor Login
  • Home
  • Our Team
  • Our Story
    • Our Story
    • Our Endorsements
    • Our Locations
    • Our Offices
    • Third Spaces
    • Our Collection
  • Our Approach
    • Christian Counseling
    • EMDR
    • Our Offerings
    • FAQ
  • Our Voice
  • Nuts & Bolts
    • Our Pricing
    • Our Communication Security
    • Contact Us
    • Counselor Login

BLOG

Reflections for the inner life.

PROMOTING CONNECTION

12/8/2021

3 Comments

 
Picture
We serve a lot of couples at Elbow Tree who tell us how much they enjoy pairing their couples counseling appointments with a delicious meal right next door at The Back 40 Urban Cafe. 

Recently, I mentioned this to the owners of The Back 40 and their response was to create a special 20% off coupon for every Elbow Tree couple who pairs their couples counseling appointments with a meal at their establishment.

Stay tuned for more details on the coupons. 


SUGGESTED MEAL STRATEGIES:

Go Before Counseling - Some couples have shared that they enjoy grabbing a bite to eat together next door before an appointment as an opportunity to check in with each other prior to their session. These couples report how helpful it has been to have a relaxed time over a delicious meal and to walk next door having connected for a few minutes before the session. Arriving into therapy together after having had an hour beforehand make a more effective transition creates some helpful margin between the session and other stressful parts of their life. Sharing a meal, even if the time together is a quieter time at the table, can be a gateway of sharing some space together. We encourage couples not to interpret the silence as much as to honor it. Small talk is not wasted and can be reparative if there has been tension. 

Go After Counseling - Some couples build in time after each of their counseling sessions to walk next door and debrief the previous hour. We encourage couples to adopt a spirit of curiosity in therapy together that we hope will linger into their time at The Back 40. Other couples may elect to not carry the heavy counseling conversation into their meal together and simply focus on the opportunity to be together in a more lighthearted way. A few couples have even reported that they love to order their meals from The Back 40 to go, and then they go eat them together somewhere a little more private, like a park, their favorite beach spot or even along the bay front downtown. 

Regardless, counseling appointments don't have to be limited to the 50 minutes you are in session. You can be more intentional and anticipate what you may need on the front or back end. When couples carve out room before and after a session, it allows for them to more effectively prepare and recover from a session. You can also attempt both and then choose the one that is your preference. 


Some helpful pre-counseling mealtime questions:
1. How can I be supportive of you in our session together today? 
2. What's the state of your heart as you are arriving to our time together (fearful, discouraged, despairing, delighted, pleased, hopeful)?
3. Is there anything that you wish we had discussed in our previous session that we want to be sure to touch on in our session today? 

Some helpful post-counseling mealtime questions:
1.  How can I be supportive this next week of the things you shared today in our counseling session?

2. Is there anything that we discussed in counseling that you'd like to continue debriefing together? 
3. Is there anything you wished we'd discussed in counseling that we didn't and do you want to talk about that now or in our next session? 


This is not an exhausting list of questions, and you may have some questions of your own that work best for you and your partner. Regardless, we are huge proponents of building in additional opportunities for helping couples take full advantage of the counseling process. Build a meal into the process can be a terrific source of help as you do this important work together and build habits of healthy connection. 

Picture
Hayne Steen, LMHC
hayne@elbowtreeflorida.com


Hayne Steen
 is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor in the state of Florida (MH16012) with a masters degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Richmont Graduate University. Hayne owns and operates Elbow Tree, a local mom and pop counseling shop on the north Florida coast, in St. Augustine, Florida. He specializes in EMDR, Internal Family Systems and TFCBT therapies and works with men and women impacted by trauma and PTSD. Hayne also serves on an after-hours Mobile Crisis Response Team with St. Augustine Youth Services. Several times a year, Hayne hosts week long Soul Care Intensives for missionaries and ministry leaders from all over the country.
3 Comments
Brian Johnson link
10/7/2022 02:34:24 pm

Give in board least contain write traditional. Least rest serve amount plan.
Dinner scene day specific detail future. Now fact agent seat husband.

Reply
Michael Cooper link
10/13/2022 01:53:51 pm

It ability nation almost building may. Environment from medical edge course.
Which nation traditional new team business. That agent significant civil. Other adult take.

Reply
Victor Francis link
11/14/2022 01:45:02 pm

Ago yeah page magazine. Course value according that civil exist American. Can life price ok clear live.
Raise thought possible individual TV hotel. Herself consumer serious but.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    ELBOW TREE

    Archives

    February 2022
    December 2021
    February 2021
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    March 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017

    Categories

    All
    Appointment
    Attachment
    Being Known
    Character
    Community
    Connection
    Couples
    Emotion
    Empathy
    Endurance
    Failure
    Formation
    Heart
    Hope
    Loneliness
    Marriage
    Men
    Pain
    Perseverence
    Rapport
    Recovery
    Referral
    Resilience
    Schedule
    Therapists
    Therapy
    Trust
    Warmth

    RSS Feed

Picture
St. Augustine Office
Picture

ST. AUGUSTINE OFFICE
​
 
38 South Dixie Highway
Saint Augustine, FL 32084​


JACKSONVILLE BEACH OFFICE
​
 
408 4th Street North
Jacksonville Beach, FL 32250


MANDARIN OFFICE
​
 12724 Gran Bay Parkway West
Suite 410
​Jacksonville, FL 32258


Office | 904.559.1944     
Email | turnhere@elbowtreeflorida.com

Picture
Jacksonville Beach Office
Picture
Mandarin Office - Beginning February 2023
*Elbow Tree Christian Counseling, LLC in Saint Augustine & Jacksonville Beach is independently owned and operated. 

Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture
Picture